minutes like hours

gah. slow day today. like waitin fer the paint to peel off the walls. tomorrow's gonna be 1st April according to the Gregorian calendar. April foos day. jus like the followers of the Crucified goD to make foos of emselves.

in anycase, here is religion in brief:

#1: y'all know the chinese practice of burning papers fer the dead? apparently the dead needs teeth dentures, lingerie and treadmills. das jus awesome.
read it more here:
http://sg.news.yahoo.com/ap/20090330/tap-as-malaysia-dentures-for-the-dead-b3c65ae.html

#2: muslims brothers who smoke. well you guys, especially those in Malaysia & Indonesia, are gonna spend a longer time in hell. jus so you know we are ALL going to hell. check it:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20090327/od_uk_nm/oukoe_uk_religion_malaysia_smoking;_ylt=AiXk1yCauK7DeZuP4uFyzXjtiBIF


20 more minutes before i get to wank off. thank The Lord!

Complementary

Hail weaklings,
It is I, the Mighty one!, back to fill your puny minds with me great undertakings.
Let me take all of you back 3 days ago, Saturday to be precise. YES! I AM capable of time travelling. It is but one of the astronomical abilities that I possess. Stop interrupting!

Anyways, where was I? Ah, 3 days ago. It was circa 3pm in the afternoon. I expounded my plan to my allies all across this pitiful dirt that is Singapore, for a relaxing night of shisha, accompanied by sensual belly dancers. In the end, only one answered the call to arms. Tony. Yeah...
Bob had it in him to bubble me right at the very last minute of the last second. Congrats Bob. I'm not surprised that he stood me up, for it is in the Malay genes to commit such a heinous act. Yet for an ally to blow me off (it aint watcha think, sleaze-minded foos!) like that, it is next to heresy! But worry not Bob, for I am merciful, if not unforgiving.

Fast forward to Monday; I skipped Sunday for it is the day when the Mighty Ones rest. As I was saying, Monday. Went through work like a red-hot machete through animal fat. So it happened went out with me sister and mother. Stopped at Secret Recipe for slice of cakes. Apparently, the cretin of a waiter was trying to make a move on me sister. By using a cheap tactic; offering a complementary drink. All the time he was proclaiming that comple-fuckin-mentary drink he was looking at me sister. Probably trying to impress me mother. Bull-whore-shit I say! Just like a typical Malay. Complementary. Complementary... How about I is give you a complementary beat down, watcha say ta that weasel?!
Word o the day: Complementary.

Enough, I grow weary of this chatter. Begone all of you insufferable twits..

A new Disease is born

slow enfeeblement of your mind
flesh be the host to agonizing putrefaction
I am Sickness unto you

-------------------------------------------

Das my first forage into the world of Haiku.

In anycase Bob(aka Greater Great) gave a thought-provoking quote during the weekend. "A pessimist is what an optimist calls a realist". Think about it.

Rain, Scrabble and the Corpse revival

Twas Saturday, went out with Tony to get me a pair o new shoes cuz me old one wus busted. Entered the train..all was cool until we reached Jurong East MRT Station. In walked this 40ish Chinese lady yelling out "Nabei Cheebai!". Throughout the journey to the shoe shop, she'd sporadically burst out some chinese words which no doubt were filled with venomous intent. The sods in the train were flabbergasted. Whereas the two macho guys, namely me & Tony, were laughing our nasal hair off at the scene. That shit right there jus made me day.

So, onwards we marched in the quest for me new pair o footwear. Once that has been taken care off we trudged on to the Expo Hall for a Bike + Motorcycle exhibition. Nothing of note to be mentioned.. besides a lady who bent over which gave us both the opportunity to traverse the Abyss.

Havin planned ta meet Daddy & Ricky at Arab St later during evening, me & Tony scouted out other joints since us both gettin tired of the old one. Fate was conspiring against us it seemed. Other joints were either fully booked, reserved or jus plain crap. In the end we plonked out asses at the same old joint. Next Door Cafe to be precise. Ordered Raspberry Black Tea and Orange flava shisha. Note to self, don't order Orange flava shisha. Few minutes later Daddy appeared, while Ricky can't be received due to the disinclined weather at his area.

So, its jus the 3 o us sippin tea, puffin shisha and scrabbling Scrabble. It started raining heavily and we thanked the Powers for our hot tea. Really is the remedy for cold. Lo and behold, we managed to finish up Scrabble...using up all the tiles no shit! YES EVERY TILES mafugga!!! Will present a photographic evidence for those disbelievers out there, may you be infected with crotch rot! Thus endeth our Saturday night.

On the Metal front... well praise be, the Great Corpse is back! Seemingly, these guys can do no wrong with their latest sledgehammer to the face; EVISCERATION PLAGUE.

There it is ladies and gentlecorpses. Sweet music to accompany me as I vent my fury on the unsuspecting kids. The production is solid, guitar riffs infectious, drumming and bass pummeling my scrotum and the vocals.. heh the Vokills... George Fisher aint called "Corpsegrinder" fer nuthing. Yeah the fore-father of Death Metal is pretty much slaying still!

See, even Unca Ronald agrees... right Unca Ronald?

(thanks go out to Bob for the reference...)