Complementary

Hail weaklings,
It is I, the Mighty one!, back to fill your puny minds with me great undertakings.
Let me take all of you back 3 days ago, Saturday to be precise. YES! I AM capable of time travelling. It is but one of the astronomical abilities that I possess. Stop interrupting!

Anyways, where was I? Ah, 3 days ago. It was circa 3pm in the afternoon. I expounded my plan to my allies all across this pitiful dirt that is Singapore, for a relaxing night of shisha, accompanied by sensual belly dancers. In the end, only one answered the call to arms. Tony. Yeah...
Bob had it in him to bubble me right at the very last minute of the last second. Congrats Bob. I'm not surprised that he stood me up, for it is in the Malay genes to commit such a heinous act. Yet for an ally to blow me off (it aint watcha think, sleaze-minded foos!) like that, it is next to heresy! But worry not Bob, for I am merciful, if not unforgiving.

Fast forward to Monday; I skipped Sunday for it is the day when the Mighty Ones rest. As I was saying, Monday. Went through work like a red-hot machete through animal fat. So it happened went out with me sister and mother. Stopped at Secret Recipe for slice of cakes. Apparently, the cretin of a waiter was trying to make a move on me sister. By using a cheap tactic; offering a complementary drink. All the time he was proclaiming that comple-fuckin-mentary drink he was looking at me sister. Probably trying to impress me mother. Bull-whore-shit I say! Just like a typical Malay. Complementary. Complementary... How about I is give you a complementary beat down, watcha say ta that weasel?!
Word o the day: Complementary.

Enough, I grow weary of this chatter. Begone all of you insufferable twits..